From the archive No. 31

Al Tawwab

The Granter and Accepter of Repentance

Louisa Marks & Carroll Thompson · UK·originally posted 27 September 2016

In the background this week Angelina Jolie files for divorce and I can feel my collective female pain body come into the forefront of my mind. Eckhart Tolle in his book Power of Now talks about this idea of the pain body and I loved learning about the collective pain body. This is something I recognise in me as a woman. Whenever something happens to a woman I immediately can feel or empathise with her pain. It takes me back to when I was very young at school. I would listen to the pirate radio stations to a form of reggae called lovers rock.

Even today a few of us ladies can get together and we always say men cant sing lovers! Back then I was so young with hardly any experience of love and relationships but the lovers rock music felt like home. When we used to talk about boys in school it was about who’s broken up and who has cheated on who etc. and these songs were just a comforting reminder that all men were gonna break your heart one day. How long ago were those days and now as a mother of a son I do not hold such views. But every so often I catch the collective female pain body giving me thoughts and ideas that I have to try catch before they take hold. I still love listening to lovers and below are two of my favourite songs. Reggae music just always feels good, like the sun shining and somehow these songs even though they talk of heartbreak still have a feel good vibe and thats why I think they stand the test of time. Now I tap into the feel good of my youth, the comfort of my parents home, thinking about love and just being happy. Some days I just put Carol Thompson in youtube and click the 50 mix and let it play all day - its great to do housework too or just chill!

According to my source the 79th name At Tawwab is the forgiveness that enables you to turn away from grudges, and perceived individual defects, towards the perfection of Allah/God. It comes with the realisation that the divine beloved is always turning towards you, continually offering a gaze of deep forgiveness and endless compassion. At Tawwab conveys the real meaning of repentance, the turning from the limitations of the false self and towards the perfection of your immortal soul, which is not separate from the divine reality. Realising At Tawwab involves giving up the attachment of being right. It means giving up self righteousness and letting go of the grudge. It is to turn your face toward someone else with forgiveness and compassion. It uses the densest elements of a situation as an inner impetus for transformation and to turn toward God. Repetition of Ya Tawwb allows you to turn towards the divine face in every face. It is an antidote for clinging to, and identifying with, a wounded sense of self-deficiency.

Hope these words are of some comfort to anyone needing them and Angelia in case she reads this one day!

Please share your favourite lovers tracks here...cant wait to hear them!!!

Also referenced in this post

Reader comments

AM·

Sufi, What can i say, you have taken me back to the music i grow up to my teenage years. These songs and more where an education to me. Not knowing the love or had the experiences these women had i could not relate but boy did it prepare me for what could happen. Now i can say i have experienced some, sadly.

My favourite song is this one below, not because of experience but because i felt so deeply sorry for women who have experienced it to image such emptiness and loneliness. Even at such a young age i could not image anything so painful happening to me.

I believe this is where i learnt how to love myself, wow the power of music.

This is just a quick reply will get back to this blog later - God willing

Sufi Punk·

Yes I know this one. Its a funny one because when I first heard the album I didn't warm to it - I think it was because it was maybe too close to home - meaning my asian culture. This music was escapism for me and I was doing something different. But as I got older my resistance didn't make sense any more and I just accepted the words for what they do to me. Yes its easier to see from the outside what you are doing and what needs to change. When you are in it you don't see it coming...

Aya·

Blessings beautiful, such a musical-mystical treat again..

Listening to these wonderful songs in the context of forgiveness, I remembered a collection of reggae songs I'd saved in a playlist and from which I somehow wished to share Judy Mowatt's 'Black woman', even though it seems beyond the lovers rock genre and resonates with heartbreak (and compassion and forgiveness) from a whole different place within the feminine.

Judy Mowatt - Black Woman

Black woman, ooh, black woman
Light me up, troubled long
You trod one of life's roughest roads
You got the heaviest load

To be someone, to belong
Too near mile and a half furlong
Don't give up now
Just pray for strength now
For you I dedicate my song

(..)

We are forsaked once in the plantation
Lashes to our skin
On auction blocks we were chained and sold
Handled merchandise
Highly abused and ??
And thrown in garbage bins
But no need for that now
Free us, stand on back now
And help me to sing my song

(..)

When you're fighting stand up for the right thing
And not that which is wrong
I heard Rachel mourning for her children
When Herod and Pharaoh took their little heads
But just like Mary and Joseph
Mother of Moses too
Overcame its evil devices
I dedicate my song for you

(..)

Black woman, ooh, black woman
I know you've struggled long
I feel your afflictions
To you I dedicate my song

Aya·

Later I noticed the lyrics I copied-pasted contain some errors. Hope I corrected them well.

Black woman, ooh, black woman
Light me up, troubled long
You trod one of life's roughest roads
You get the heaviest load

To be someone, to belong
(Too near and your mile and a half furlong)
Don't give up now
Just pray for strength now
For you I dedicate my song

(..)

We are forsaken once in the plantation
Lashes to our skin
On auction blocks we were chained and cold
End of merchandise
Harmingly abused and warmth we were refused
And thrown in the garbage bins
But no need for that now
Free yourself of that now
And help me sing my song

(..)

When you're fighting stand up for the right thing
And not that which is wrong
I heard Rachel mourning for her children
When Herod and Pharaoh took their little heads
But like Mary and like Joseph
Mother of Moses too
Overcame its evil devices
I dedicate my song for you

(..)

Black woman, ooh, black woman
I know you've struggled long
I feel your afflictions
To you I dedicate my song

Sufi Punk·

Im going to check the songs out now! Big thanks x

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No. 31 · Al Tawwab — Inspiring the Sufi · Inspiring the Sufi